


Of irony and sympathy.

by Treegona



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Artistic License - Panic attacks, Emotional Growth, Gen, Mild hurt with the promise of comfort, This isn't how anything works.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-07-12 19:22:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16001687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Treegona/pseuds/Treegona
Summary: The irony of it is, Tony doesn’t even want to be here. The building’s unstable, it’s late and Tony doesn’t actually really mind if they never complete this rescue.Basically, Bucky's in a bad place and Tony gets over his shit enough to help a guy out.





	Of irony and sympathy.

**Author's Note:**

> Written as a conclusion to a dream someone on the WinterIron server had, because I needed to write a good conclusion. 
> 
> The basic premise is that 90% of Civil War never happened, Bucky joined the Avengers but Tony's Not Okay with it.

The irony of it is, Tony doesn’t even want to be here. The building’s unstable, it’s late and Tony doesn’t actually really mind if they never complete this rescue. 

_But then Steve would be sad_ a traitorous part of his brain says. _and not even never seeing Barnes’ vacant mug anymore is worth making Cap sad._ So Tony goes along on the mission to rescue their resident ex-Russian assassin –No, not Romanov, the other one. Even if he’d much prefer Barnes go die in a ditch somewhere. 

_This_ is why it’s ironic when, thirty minutes after parts of the HYDRA base they’re raiding explode, _Tony’s_ the one to find him.

Tony finds Barnes on the floor. He lies, as fetal as he can probably get, under a boulder. When Tony zooms his display in on Barnes, in part to check for vital signs, in part to not have to get closer, he finds Barnes has failed to die. Closer inspection shows increased heart rate and breading –as is understandable of someone being pinned by a large rock- but also tremors –which is decidedly not.

It’s when Tony steps closer that he realizes why Barnes is shivering. The Ironman armor is an elegant piece of engineering and machinery, but it’s not subtle when it walks. But Barnes doesn’t look up. Instead, he’s talking, not to tony, not seemingly to _anyone_. 

“- sorry, so sorry. Please, no, I’m sorry. I don’t want to die, please. Please, I’m sorry. I’ll be better, sorry sorry, please stop. Please-”

Tony listens for longer than he should, longer than he’s proud of. Something in seeing Barnes like this, brought low not just by his physical situation but by his own mind. It reminds Tony of Afghanistan, yes -of holding onto his life when it’s the only thing he has left- but also of Obie. Of knowing he’s failed, come up short, and will be punished for it. And that punishment can cost him the very life he’s fought so hard to keep. 

This is when it hits him that the person before him is James Barnes, soldier, POW, veteran, victim and survivor. He’s not the mindless killing machine that took Tony’s parents, he’s not some sleeper agent hell-bent on taking Tony’s loved ones away _again_. James Buchanan Barnes is a traumatized veteran who puts himself back in the thick of war to hold onto that he holds most dear. And suddenly Tony can no longer see Barnes as the monster who murdered his mother. 

Priorities suddenly shift and, dimly, Tony realizes that this is just the earthquaking culmination of longer emotional tectonic activity. 

The first order of business is Barnes’ awareness. This version of the armor is more for blasting than lifting. Tony estimates that he can lift the rock, but Barnes will have to get his own ass out of dodge. 

The quick diagnostic Tony ran showed no signs of physical injury. He’s missed stuff before though, so he’s very careful when reaching out to touch Barnes’ shoulder. Barnes still freezes. Barnes stops muttering, stops shaking, stops _breathing_. 

“Barnes.” Tony says, very careful not to shake the shoulder he’s touching. This gets him no response and neither does “James”. James hasn’t breathed in ten seconds. Tony feels bad for half a moment using this name, but calling the man _Bucky_ finally snaps him back to the present. 

“Bucky, hey, Barnes.” Barnes regains awareness step by step, first his predicament, then Tony and finally their location. 

“Barnes. I’m going to need you to stay with me here, Robocop. If I lift this off you, can you move?”

Barnes nods, still a bit dazed, but when Tony moves to get a grip on the boulder he asks “Why are you helping me? You hate me.”

Tony busies himself with the rock rather than answer. “I-” Tony starts as he instructs the suit to lift “I never hated _you_.” Barnes looks as incredulous as it is possible to look while pinned to the ground. “I hated what you’d done, even unwillingly. I hated what you represent.”

“Hated? Past tense? Am I growing on you?” Barnes asks as he crawls away out from under the boulder.

“Hah.” Tony punctuates his dry laugh by dropping his burden. “You wish. But I… Might have judged you for things you didn’t do, things you had no choice in. And that’s” he shrugs “pretty goddamn hypocritical.”

Barnes laughs, stressed, exhausted but real, and tries to stand. 

Tony catches Barnes’ bicep just as his leg gives out.

“ _Shit._ ” Barnes says. He tests the ankle, sucks his teeth and shakes his head. 

Tony moves in closer, slings Barnes’ arm over his shoulders and lifts the man who crashed his parents’ car to his feet. 

“What?” Barnes asks. 

“I don’t princess carry ‘til the third date, Robocop.” Barnes huffs out a breath, apparently content with that non-explanation, and they start moving toward the other avengers, out of this wreck of a HYDRA base. Onwards and –hopefully- upwards.


End file.
